Bethlehem, Part One

We awoke bright-eyed and bushy-tailed on the morning of Saturday, December 7th, eager to begin our next adventure:  a six hour round-trip guided tour of nearby Bethlehem. 

Annnd, I'm going to pause right there.  This is my first post since arriving in Jerusalem that will really touch on religion.  I suspect a lot of them will, and because of that I just want to provide a little disclaimer right here, right now.

I was born into what, by process of elimination, would be considered a Christian home.  I am Jewish by choice.  That doesn't mean that I think Judaism is the one, true religion and everyone else is wrong.  It simply means that it is the one that works best for me.  As I write over the next two years, just assume that there are a lot of adjectives like "allegedly," "supposedly" and "theoretically" implied in my writing.  Who am I to say what did or didn't happen (and where!), often to the contrary of another person's faith? Nobody, that's who.  

Whew!  We now resume this Bethlehem blog, already in progress.  

Our first stop on this whirlwind tour was The Church of the Nativity, a basilica commissioned in 327AD by Constantine and his mother Helena over the site popularly thought to be the birthplace of Jesus of Nazareth.  The original was destroyed during the Samaritan Revolts and eventually replaced in 565AD by the current structure.  The church adds to my collection of UNESCO World Heritage Sites, and holds the distinction of being the first to be listed under Palestine (By UNESCO, not by me.  Though by me, too, I guess.).  





One enters the church through a tiny little door known as "The Door of

Humility," because you have to bow in order to enter.  Or you could Limbo.  That probably works, too, and is often humiliating.  The original purpose of the entryway's small size, however, was more pious than practical:  it helped deter vandals and invaders.

Once inside, you will find yourself pushed, shoved, and trampled over by pilgrims and tourists fighting for space that doesn't exist.  It's CROWDED.  Chaos ensues as tour guide speaks over tour guide, cameras flash, children find ways to run despite there being no space to do so, and the devout try to light candles and find a moment's peace despite their surroundings.  

Toward the back of the sanctuary you will find a staircase leading to the Grotto of the Nativity, where Jesus is said to have been born.  The exact spot is marked by a 14-pointed silver star set into a marble floor and surround by lamps.  The altar is denominationally neutral.  It is also crowded.  This is a picture of TJ standing in front of it.  I promise.

Another altar in the Grotto, maintained by the Roman Catholics, marks the site where Mary laid the newborn baby in the manger.  After posing for this picture, I stood and hit my head on the ceiling and said "Ow!"  Only….I don't think I said ow.  I think I may have, possibly, said something you shouldn't say in a church.  Oops.

Adjoining the Church of the Nativity is The Church of St. Catherine, a Roman Catholic church built in a modern Gothic revival style.  

This is the church where the Latin Patriarch of Jerusalem celebrate the world famous Christmas Eve Midnight Mass.   [SPOILER ALERT!  There will be more on that tomorrow!]

The Tree of Jesse (aka Call of David), on display at the entrance, was blessed by Pope Benedict XVI during his 2009 trip to the Holy Land.  The Bas-relief represents the visit of the prophet Samuel to Jesse (seated, surrounded by seven of his sons).  On the opposite side is David, the youngest son, arriving with his flock.  The angel reminds us that the promises made to David have been fulfilled with the Incarnation of the Son of God. The tree symbolizes the genealogy of Christ, who is situated at the highness place in the sculpture. 

Beneath The Church of St. Catherine lay a a series of caverns that make up the remains of an ancient monastery.  The caves contain a number of chapels, one dedicated to St. Jerome, who spent 30 years translating the Hebrew Bible form Hebrew into Latin, and the New Testament from Greek into Latin. 

Next on the agenda was the Milk Grotto Chapel.  It is said that Mary and Joseph stopped here to feed baby Jesus while journeying to Egypt.  Legend tells that a drop of Mary's breast milk touched the ground, causing the red rock of the grotto to turn white.  It is said that the rock has healing properties, were it to be ground up and consumed.  Make of that what you will, but I know what *I* think.  Nevertheless, if you google this place you will find all sorts of miracles that the grotto has caused to occur.  There's not much to the place other than a nifty sculpture of the Holy Family and a few images of Mary breastfeeding the baby.  Oh.  There were also some young female tourists at the entrance arching their backs and poking their breasts out seductively as they posed for pictures.  Way to keep it classy, people.

We next made our way to Manger Square, passing numerous craftsman shops along the way.  Tourism is the leading industry in Bethlehem, and many people make their livings carving intricately detailed nativity scenes and selling them in their souvenir shops.

Manger Square is of course named after the manger in which Jesus was born, and the Church of the Nativity lies at the edge of the square.  This being December, Christmas is exploding all over Bethlehem, and Manger Square is the focal point of the celebration, with a giant Christmas Tree and a beautiful manger taking center stage.  Bethlehem's only mosque, The Mosque of Omar, lies across the square.  Named after the second caliph, Omar Ibn al-Khattab, the mosque was built in 1860 on land provided by the Greek Orthodox Church in honor of Omar, the Prophet Mohammed's father-in-law.  In 637, Omar took Jerusalem from the Byzantines and stopped for prayer at the Christian Church of the Nativity.  He declared that the church would remain a Christian shrine and that Christians, even under Muslim rule, would remain free to practice their faith.

The tour portion of our journey concluded at Sheperd's Field, located two kilometers outside of Bethlehem near the town of Beit Sahour (بيت ساحو).  Christians believe this to be the site at which an angel appeared to the shepherds and announced the birth of Jesus.

8 Now there were in the same country shepherds living out in the fields, keeping watch over their flock by night.  9 And behold, an angel of the Lord stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were greatly afraid.  10 Then the angel said to them, "do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people.  11 For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.  12 And this will be the sign to you:  You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling cloths, lying in a manger."  13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying:  14  "Glory to God in the highest, And on earth peace, goodwill toward men!"  

-Luke  2:8-14

The main attraction here is the Church of the Angels (above), a modestly sized, domed house of worship featuring three paintings each depicting a different aspect of the birth narrative from Luke 2.

Underneath the church is another church, built in a cave by Saint Helena in 325AD.  This cavern is thought to have been the shelter used by the shepherds on that fateful night.  

The tour concluded with a short (though it felt like it lasted forever.  FOREVER!) stop at one of the tackiest gift shops I've ever seen.  So tacky that they even sell postcards of their shop.  So tacky that they replaced the baby Jesus with a disco ball.  You know how Christmas has become so commercialized with decorations going on sale right after Halloween and Black Friday consumingThanksgiving?  That's kind of what this place does to the Holy Land.  Everything was priced in US Dollars.  I couldn't believe it.  They did offer a 30% discount, though.  But guess what.  It's still more expensive, and of a lower quality, than just about anything you will find in Old City Jerusalem.  There, that's your PSA for the day.

After the attempted tourist exploitation, we crossed the street and settled in for a delicious lunch of wine, meatballs, smoked chicken, and hummus at the Grotto Restaurant. I didn't take any pictures of the food because it was served family style at a table of eight and those hungry vultures weren't playing.  I was too busy fighting for food, so you'll just have to trust me that it looked (and tasted) amazing.  Speaking of amazing, how about that dining view?

That wrapped up our day in Bethlehem.  I headed home and promptly started writing.  Then I took a break.  Then it began to snow (Not that same day…it was a long break).  Then the snow melted.  Then I continued taking my break.  But, lo!  We won two tickets to the Christmas Eve Midnight Mass!  

As chronological writing demands, I simply had to get this one all wrapped up in a pretty little bow for you all so that tomorrow I can regale you all with tales of this evening's adventures!

Hope everyone has a safe and happy Christmas Eve (or as us non-Christians like to call it, Tuesday night).  See you tomorrow!

Caesarea, Part One

Ever since arriving in Jerusalem I've felt absolutely defeated by how much ground there is to cover and by how seemingly little we've done to scratch the surface.  I have found myself on numerous occasions exploring a museum or a town or a market and thinking "Gee, that was fun…but I didn't finish.  And I can't write about it if I didn't finish."  Or doing something and thinking "That was awesome, but not first-post-about-Jerusalem awesome."  Like anyone is sitting on pins and needles waiting for me to type out a masterpiece.  Well, nobody save for TJ, who just wants to retire early and live off of my millions.

Regardless, all this worrying has accomplished is two months of presence in the Holy Land and four posts that don't even come close to documenting my life here.  So let's get started, shall we?

We woke up this morning and realized we wanted to not be in Jerusalem today.  While trying to decide what to do, our friend Yehuda sent a Facebook message indicating some level of boredom on his part as well.  TJ asked where I would like to go, and I said the first city that popped into my head: Caesarea.  

Caesarea was built by King Herod (37 - 4 BCE) on the remains of a Phoenician town, Strato's Tower (which sounds more like an building than a town to me), and named in honor of his patron, Agustus Caesar.  Initially, Caesarea's residents enjoyed all the pleasures of the Roman world:  abundant clean water, bathhouses, and entertainment venues.  

Caesarea became the seat of the Roman governors around 6 CE and the status of the city's Jewish population quickly began to deteriorate.  66 CE saw a rebellion agains the Romans.   By 70 CE, Jerusalem had fallen and Caesarea was considered to be the Roman capital of Judea. 

Caesarea gained status as an important center of Christian scholarship during the Byzantine period, and its harbor became the gateway to the Holy Land for thousands of pilgrims.  The Jewish community grew and religious academies were founded.  

What came next was a series of conflicts in which the city found itself controlled by Muslims, Crusaders and even the French.  The city was abandoned following the Mameluke conquest of 1265, though Ottoman authorities eventually settled a group of Bosnian Muslim refugees there.

Annnnd now you know everything that I read on the plaque located at the entrance of Caesarea National Park.  Let's head inside.  

First up was the Roman theatre, built between 22-10 B.C.  The first of its kind in Israel, the already impressive amphitheater underwent several alterations throughout the Roman and Byzantine periods, including the conversion of the orchestra into a large basin for nautical games sometime during the 3rd or 4th century A.D.  Apparently, the theatre was home to some debaucherous fare, as it was ultimately closed by an offended regime of Christian Byzantine rulers during the 5th century A.D.

Yehuda informed us that in today's post-excavation world, Herod's ancient theatre is often used as a performance venue for popular Israeli and international artists.  It appears to be a popular locale, as a little on-line research told me that the nearby port hosts the annual Caesarea Jazz Festival, a three-night event featuring leading international artists.  Speaking of the port, lets draw our attention to the horizon where, from the top steps of the amphitheater, one can find a gorgeous view of the Mediterranean Sea.

Descending the theater steps, our attentions were drawn to platform containing several examples of Roman and Byzantine statuary.  Most of Caesarea's statues were found headless during the excavation process.  Roman statuary, representing emperors, deities and local dignitaries, remained an important part of the urban ornament of the Byzantine city, and was sometimes displayed in Christian contexts alongside Christian symbols.

Beyond Herod's Theater you will notice a rocky point overlooking the sea.  Once upon a time, this was the home of the Promontory Palace, a behemoth of a structure built during Roman times.  Among the ruins is a pool, potentially used as a fish market.

In its heyday the palace took up a whopping 4 acres of real estate and extended out into the sea.  Situated within site of both the theater and the hippodrome, the palace was a subtle reminder to the crowds of the might and generosity of the ruler who provided the spectacles.  

In 58 A.D. the Apostle Paul was sent to Caesarea to be tried by the governor under false charges of desecrating the Temple.  It is speculated the the hearing occurred within the walls of this very palace.  Not satisfied with the outcome of this meeting, Paul exercised his right as a Roman citizen and demanded a hearing in the Emperor's Court in Rome.  He went on to be executed for the crime.  We, however, went on to the aforementioned hippodrome. 

The hippodrome, or the Herodian Amphitheater, was famous for its chariot races, which ran for seven laps along a course 250m long by 50m wide.  Races began at the starting gates and ended in front of the dignitaries' tribune.  Either end of the course featured two turning points with sharp curves that posed incredible danger for the charioteers and their horses.  Needless to say, seats at each end of the amphitheater were highly coveted.  

Just past the hippodrome are the remains of a bathhouse, the only important remain of the private wing of the Byzantine governor's palace, which was almost entirely destroyed by the construction of medieval fortifications.  Check out that mosaic tile.  Isn't it gorgeous?!?  The remains of a public bathhouse featuring many more mosaics can also be found on the grounds, but we unfortunately ran out of time before the park closed.

Stepping outside of the gates to the national park, we were shocked to find that we were standing in…more ruins.  

The Bosnian Mosque, constructed by the Turks for the Bosnian refugees in the late 19th century, is an easily identifiable fixture down by Crusader Harbor...

…while directly across and uphill you can find the partially excavated remains of several structures clumped together side by side:  

The Crusader Church (13th Century) - Construction was undertaken by France's King Louix IX but never completed.  A smaller church eventually took its place.  The Cathedral of St. Peter, formerly the city's Great Mosque, stood northeast of it but was destroyed in 1187. 

The Temple of Caesar, built when the city was founded 22 - 10 BCE - Herod's temple stood on this site.  Archaeologists are still trying to identify the temple's foundation beneath later buildings.  

A Christian church stood on the site of Herod's temple in the 6hh century.    The church was octagonal in shape like Jerusalem's Dome of the Rock and the building contained floors and walls made of marble.  

On the other side of the ruins we found the Postern Gate, a remnant of the Crusader Period (12th - 13th centuries) that served as a secret entrance/exit by way of the moat.

The view from the top of the moat (or rather the wall that looked down into the moat) gave us a glimpse of the public bathhouse, which served as a reminder that we couldn't go inside…which served as a reminder that it was getting late and therefore time for dinner. 

We walked over to the harbor where we dined on fish and chips (TJ and me) and lamb kabobs (Yehuda) at Port Cafe, Lonely Planet's sole dining recommendation for the city.  Not a bad recommendation at all.  The food was delicious, and the ocean view was amazing.

Sadly, the day ends there.  (Well, there plus a two hour drive.)  But it was the perfect end to a perfect day.  Although we spent but a few short hours in Caesarea, I feel as if we experienced a lot.  It was the first excursion that had me saying "Must blog tonight!"  It's inspired me to go back through my photos and perhaps post about some prior experiences.  

It's definitely inspired me to return to Caesarea one day soon, hence the "Part One" aspect of the post title.

Lowered Expectations

Among my favorite skits from Fox Broadcasting Company's now-defunct sketch comedy show MADtv was one called "Lowered Expectations," in which the dregs of society recorded video solicitations for a dating service.  None of these folks were winners but, hey, you knew that going in.  If you were so inclined to give one of them a chance, perhaps you'd be pleasantly surprised.  But probably not.

Lowered expectations were exactly what we were facing when, in February 2013, fresh off of a pretty remarkable tour in Guadalajara during which we lived in an amazing house, we received our housing assignment for Jerusalem.

Many words rushed through our minds as we took in the photos that were sent along with the notification of assignment.  "Small."  "Ordinary."  "Plain." "Mediocre."  These were a few of those words.  Some of the other words aren't fit for print.  Here, let me show you a few of these gems.

A little…musty, right?  Lacking in personality.

This had been a concern of mine as far back as September 2010.  We were living in Falls Church, VA at the time while TJ finished up his Spanish studies, and I was contemplating our upcoming move to Guadalajara.  I wondered if, moving every couple of years or so, we would ever be able to feel at home anywhere…to truly believe that our personalities were reflected in our living space.  When we arrived in Guadalajara that fear became moot.  We had a gorgeous house that, despite the standard issue government furniture, had a lot of potential.  There were amazing furniture stores and artisan markets galore, and pretty quickly we found ourselves filling the place with things that we enjoyed.  We bought new couches, new bedroom furniture and so much local artwork that by the time we left we felt as if were saying goodbye to a part of ourselves.

When the Jerusalem housing assignment came through, we had already been separated from our stuff for about five months.  We had been living in government assigned housing with dreary, standard-issue furniture.   And there we were, looking seven months into the future at pictures of more of the same.  It was disheartening, but we quickly put on our big boy pants and decided that no matter what, we'd make the most of it.

When we arrived in Jerusalem in September, we immediately realized two things:  One, that the photos provided were not of our apartment, but of another unit within the complex that was a mirror image of ours…everything was flipped around; Two, the photos did not do the place justice.

It was practically love at first site.  But it still wasn't home.  We chose a color scheme and quickly set about painting the living room, kitchen and master bedroom, as those would be the spaces in which we spent the most time.  After that, we waited.  It was a long two months between the time we arrived and when we were finally reunited with our personal possessions and our Jeep.  All told, we hadn't seen most of this stuff in a year.  An entire year.  That just boggles the mind.  

During the two months of waiting, we tried to busy ourselves.   We explored Jerusalem.  We frolicked along the shorelines of Tel Aviv.  We visited Haifa.  I took a three-hour market tour/cooking class.  We spent time with co-workers and met a few locals.  These are all things that I thoroughly enjoyed and wanted to write about…but I was in a funk.  I didn't feel like I was home…but I didn't feel like I was traveling, either.  I just was.

That all changed the moment we finished unpacking.  (Okay, okay, there are still a couple of boxes hidden in the study.  I'll get to them soon.)  It was as if someone flipped a switch.  We were home.

Check it out!

We will be the first to admit that the color palette won't be to everyone's liking.  It's a little quirky.  Just like us.  In other words, Mission: Insert Our Personality has been accomplished!  There's still some work to do, like finding some more wall art, adding a plant or two, finding something to fill that negative space by the television and putting a glass in that mirror…but it's home.  We're finally feeling settled. 

We've also learned something from this experience.  When we get our housing assignments for future posts, we will try to keep our expectations lowered.  That way, we will always be pleasantly surprised.

But probably not.  

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The Wonderful World of Disney (and Universal, Too!)

If we've learned anything since joining the Foreign Service, it's that the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.

Case in point:  Our original plan had been to enjoy a nice, relaxing home leave on the West Coast following our two year assignment in Mexico.  We planned it out and it looked like we could spend a month in California, Washington, Vegas, etc. before heading to Virginia for TJ's Arabic training.  The State Department didn't agree, and all of the training came first.  That was fine, no biggie.  The only hiccup was that, were home leave to begin prior to training, we could control where the flight out of Mexico took us (i.e. West Coast), whereas having home leave after training meant we were already situated in Virginia (i.e. East Coast).  We weren't too keen on driving all the way out west, so a new plan was formulated.

...And, there we were.  At last.  A long ten months and eight days after leaving Mexico, we finally arrived in Orlando.  Home.  

What follows is basically an episode of any sitcom that ran during ABC's TGIF Friday night programming following the Disney/ABC merger in the mid-90s.  You know the drill:  The Tanner family (or the Foster-Lambert family, or the Winslow family, etc.) goes to Disney World and spends 22 minutes (plus commercials!) getting themselves stuck in a series of hilarious yet troublesome situations that will be resolved the following week (these were typically two-parters) while they float seamlessly between parks as if they are all the same place.  

This probably won't be as entertaining as all that, but we did float seamlessly between parks for the duration of our nineteen day trip.  

We arrived on August 30th and, after a quick unpack and rest at the hotel, headed to Downtown Disney where we met up with our old roommate Kris.  We walked the full length of this outdoor shopping, dining, and entertainment complex during our chat.  We window shopped.  We stopped for a drink.  I took a picture with this awesome Lego Hulk.  It was nice catching up with Kris, but on the whole the experience was a tad depressing.  Pleasure Island, the section of Downtown Disney that had been devoted to nightclubs and booty shaking, had closed on September 27, 2008.  The Virgin Megastore, where TJ and I met for the first time, closed in spring 2009.  The McDonald's where we shared our first meal later that day because-it's-not-a-date-so-why-be-fancy closed on April 30, 2010, shortly after our original departure to join the Foreign Service.  Now, construction barriers are set up all over the complex, paving the way for something called "Disney Springs" that is scheduled to open in 2016.  I'll try to reserve judgement, but right now I'm just bitter that so many of the locations surrounding the beginnings of our relationship have faded away. 

The following day was spent at EPCOT, TJ's favorite of the four theme parks that fall under the Walt Disney World umbrella.  After all but conquering Future World, we set our sites on the World Showcase.  First stop was "Mexico," where we enjoyed Margaritas and nachos, listened to a mariachi band, and replaced Panchito Pistoles and José Carioca as members of The Three Caballeros.  Disney photography policy prevents the taking of pictures with their characters while in the presence of alcohol but make no mistake ladies and gentlemen, those margaritas are sitting just to the side of the far right bottom corner.  We spent the remainder of the day leisurely strolling the World Showcase and sampling foods and beverages as we took in the attractions.    

That was followed by a day at Animal Kingdom, which I have always

suspected of being situated directly above hell, due to its ever-uncomfortable, always higher than average temperatures.  Our friend Tommy joined us for a day spent traveling through time to the day of the Dinosaur, learning that it's Tough to be a Bug, embarking on a East African safari and learning all about the "Bear Necessities."  If you don't get all of those references, it's because either you don't know enough about Disney, or I know too much.  And since this is my blog, we'll throw the blame in your direction.  We would see Tommy one more time during this trip, and that would be following Tuesday evening for night of dancing and PBR at downtown Orlando's hipster club, I-Bar.  The crowds were young when we left Orlando, and even more so now.  We, unfortunateley, had aged another three years.   It took a while to get into the groove, but once we did it was fun.  If nothing else, we ended our evening better off than the guy who was sitting outside in a puddle of his own...something...when we left.  Though, looking back, maybe he did have more fun than us.  

That evening saw us arriving at Disney's HollywoodStudios for a night of turkey legs and scary fireworks (Really, Disney?  What were you thinking with this whole Fantasmic thing?) with my old friend and colleague Shalinn.  TJ was excited to ride the newly renovated Star Wars attraction (Star Tours - The Adventure Continues) for the first time, which I had managed to do during my 2011 trip to San Diego.  We had planned to meet up with Shalinn, a champion eater who manages to stay super skinny just to spite me, for an evening at a local food truck fair later in our trip, but we were sadly rained out.  Next time, pookie!

The next day was spent at my favorite park The Magic Kingdom.  We immediately headed over to The New Fantasyland to explore a park renovation we had been dying to check out for months now.  Among the pleasant new features was Gaston's Tavern, where I was able to partake in something called Lefou's Brew, a frozen apple juice concoction with a hint of marshmallow, topped with a passion fruit-mango foam.  It was delicious.  This was not to be our final day at The Magic Kingdom...nor was it to be our final Lefou's Brew.

My parents drove down from Texas for a brief visit September 3-5.  In what has become something of a tradition since they started visiting us in Orlando all those years ago, we made sure that they got to experience one of the local dinner shows.  This time around it was Disney's Spirit of Aloha at the Polynesian Resort.  The family-style buffet features hula dancing and a fire-knife performance.  On the second night we went to Kobe Japanese Steakhouse for a teppanyaki-style dining experience TJ and I introduced them to on their last visit, and that they seem bent on turning into a second dining tradition.  Sounds good to me!  Not much in the way of activity to report beyond that.  They weren't keen on visiting the parks ("There's more to life than Disney," I believe mom said....I know, right?  She's totally crazy.), so we did the family thing where you sit and talk and reminisce and sometimes go shopping at Target.  Important things to do, as I'm not quite sure if/when we will be returning to the states, other than the end of our tour in Jerusalem. 

While we were at the luau, our car got to hang out with Herbie!

That Saturday I got to meet TJ's sister, brother-in-law, nieces and nephew for the first time.  They had recently moved to Tampa and, thanks to Kris's awesomeness (and employment benefits), we were able to treat them to a day at Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure.  The kids all had a great time, with TJ's nephew happily proclaiming "This is the best vacation ever!"  Indeed, kid.  Please note in the attached photo, the sleeping baby in the fore with all of the "must-be-this-tall-to-ride" graduates happily queued up and ready to go in the background.  We all had a fun-filled day meeting Spider-Man, exploring Hogwarts and going on an adventure with the Autobots.  It was my first time truly doing the theme park experience with kids in tow, and I must say I enjoyed it.  Hopefully I'll be able to do it with a tot or two of my own one day.  

The rest of the trip was filled with more of the same.  Further exploring the parks on our own and hanging out with friends when we had the chance.

We met up with Nisrine, another old friend and colleague, for a quick chat at a local wine bar.  It was brief, but so good to see her.

We befriended a British tourist named Anwarul and went miniature golfing.  

We spent a day with Chloe.

We spent time away from Disney with Kris and his new boo, John.  Brunches, dinners, Insidious Double Features and martinis, oh my!  Oh, and I did make them return to Universal one more time.  Rain and time hadn't permitted proper exploration of the new Springfield environment.  Mission:  Accomplished.  Little known fact:  This is one of maybe four photos of Kris in existence.  I own all of them.  He's the pouty one on the right that doesn't appear to want to have the camera pointed at him.    

We had appetizers and drinks with our friend Gavin, during which time a frumpy hag of a waitress named Agatha denied me drink service after declaring that I had a mole on my neck in my driver's license photo that was not currently present on my person.  It was one of those miracle moles that you could scratch off with your fingernail, but she was having none of it.  She made me question basically everything about my life.  Diet, exercise, skin care routine.   Even with a "mole," do I look that drastically different than the person in my 2003 driver's license photo?  Who knows. But now that we are settled in and my new place of employment has a gym, I'll be hitting it hard going forward.  So that's turned a negative into a positive.  

We also took some time to visit the gorgeous little craftsman home that we purchased when the Foreign Service was but a future possibility.  The tenants are taking care of the place and have turned it into an adorable little bachelorette pad.  Should we hold on to it, it shall be a wonderful place to retire. 

Amazing that home leave ended just two and a half weeks ago.  It already feels like a lifetime.  And the two and a half weeks of home leave itself?  Felt like a day and a half.  Time flies when you're having fun, and you rarely get to do everything, or see everyone, that you'd like to.     

I don't really know how to wrap this up, because doing so is just further confirmation that our all-too short time at home is already over.  But I know we'll be back someday.  And so...

M-I-C...See ya real soon!

Etc.

Dog Days of Summer

Sometimes...not often, but sometimes, I really, really hate the Foreign Service.  Those of you on the outside looking in may see us as a bunch of highly paid pencil pushers that get to live in fancy mansions in faraway lands...in between exotic vacations to Italy and Fiji, of course.

Well, you'd be wrong.  We are actually a bunch of modestly paid pencil pushers that get to live in average-for-Middle-Class-Americans housing that just happens to be in faraway lands...in between giving up any and everything that we hold dear.  

We say goodbye to our family and friends.  To favorite restaurants and nightspots.  To old careers that we may or may not have loved.  To houses that we bought barely two years prior and thought we would grow old together in but instead will probably not set foot in for another 20-30 years...if we don't just get bored and sell them off first, of course.

And then, just when you've been at post for a couple of years...just when you've established new friends, new work connections, new local hangouts....you uproot your family and start from scratch all over again.

And sometimes...sometimes this job causes you to lose your best friend.  Your compadre.  Your pretty little girl.  That precious, dopey, flopsy mopsy golden retriever that you bought for you husband in 2007 as a present for his college graduation....but that everyone secretly knew you really bought for yourself. 

We knew almost from the beginning of our relationship that TJ had wanted to pursue a career in the US Foreign Service.  It was his dream job, but given the highly competitive nature of the State Department, we put that dream up on the "Wouldn't that be swell?" shelf in the closet.  By the time February 2010 rolled around and we realized we'd need to pull the dream down and dust it off, we had accumulated two dogs, a cat, and a 30-year mortgage.  

The house?  No biggie. Slap some paint on the walls, replace the carpet, find a property manager and rent that sucker out.  

The pets?  Also no biggie.  Throw them in the car and road trip it on up the highway until you reach Virginia.  

Then came the first pet exporting disaster.  After weeks of bureaucratic delays (both Mexican and American) resulted in several thousand dollars beyond our projected shipping expenses being tossed to the wind, the animals all arrived safely, if not a little rattled, in Guadalajara. 

Two years later, we tactfully circumvented this issue on our return trip by hiring a driver to escort them to the Texas border, from which we were able to safely and leisurely drive back to Virginia and prepare to start the whole process again. 

Almost immediately upon returning to the US, we began to crunch the numbers and realized that, bare minimum, it would cost approximately $3,500 to purchase air fare and get all the critters "up to code" per Israeli import regulations.  That's a hefty chunk of change, though certainly doable.  But...what happens when TJ receives his next posting, and it doesn't require a lengthy stay in DC?  We'd have to fly the pets back to the US for one month of mandatory home leave, and then fly them to our onward assignment.  $3,500 to get them all to Israel suddenly turned into a hypothetical $10,500 round trip experience.  Doable.  But logical?  Feasible?  Maybe not.  

Then we took a long, hard look at each of our pets.  They are all getting older.

Sophie is an 11 year old gray cat with an average life expectancy of 13-15 years.
Zelda is a nine and a half year old beagle/jack russell mix with an average life expectancy of 12-15 or 13-16 years, depending on which breed she favors.
Chloe is a six year old golden retriever with an average life expectancy of 10-12 years.

Other than a bad case of kennel cough-turned-pneumonia in Zelda's infancy, all three pets have lived perfectly healthy lives.  Assuming that continues, Sophie and Zelda are on trajectory to clock out of this mortal realm in the next few years, with Chloe following a short while later.

But stress can effect an animal's health, and all three of them arrived in Mexico looking much worse for wear.  We were hesitant to put any of them through that again.

Then we were assigned to our housing unit in Jerusalem.  It looked...shall we say...much more cozy than our accommodations in Mexico.  It also lacked a yard.   Zelda is a cuddler, but Chloe is a wild beast that loves to run.  We were concerned about a lack of space to keep her entertained.

We had already been considering the possibility of needing to find alternative homes for our furry friends as far back as February 2011.  I just didn't think it would actually happen so soon.

It was important to us that, should any of our pets leave our home, we would continue having access to them.  We began putting feelers out there to see if anyone would want to foster any of them.  Our logic was, if we could find someone we know to take them, we would do that.  If not, we would weather all health and financial risks and bring them along.

Poor Sophie.  Nobody wanted her.  She has apparently developed quite the reputation among our friends over the past decade as an evil demon from Hades.  She's actually quite sweet.  She just likes to hiss at people she doesn't know, and glare at those she does.  Plus, she isn't declawed, so that's a deal breaker for a lot of folks.  One person did offer to take her, but it would have been as an outdoor cat and we know she doesn't have the chutzpah for that.  Due to lack of viable interest by anyone but ourselves, Sophie was coming along.

Zelda would have been welcomed by our old roommate, Kris, and with open arms.  He loves her and we've always suspected that she likes him more than us, anyway.  Timing being what it is, though, he's found himself in a relationship

with someone who has pet allergies.  I suggested they break up, but apparently they're happy.  Oh well.  Another friend committed to taking her, only to back out saying his landlord didn't approve.  I've since seen pictures indicating that he's adopted two puppies, so he's currently on my poop list.  Had he said no at the onset, that would have been fine.  Sadly, he let us down so close to departure time that we had to decide whether it was worth the risk to wait for another bite or to start the lengthy and expensive process of getting vaccinations and genetic testing just in case we had to take her...at which point why not just bring her along?  And so, Zelda joined Sophie as a two-time world traveler.

Then there was Chloe.  She's so beautiful and sweet, who would NOT want her?  The day our friend had falsely committed to taking Zelda, I sent out a Facebook blast asking about Chloe.  Offers immediately poured in.  I decided on Pam, a sweet woman I have known for about eight years from a previous job.  She lives with her granddaughter who is just about to start college.  They have several dogs and a cat already and had previously shared space with a golden retriever, so they knew all about the breed's behavioral patterns (or lack thereof).  Pam graciously offered to foster Chloe while we are overseas and says she will return her upon the completion of this tour.  Pretty sweet deal, huh?  Of course, it was right around this time that our other friend reneged on his offer to take Zelda and I felt like a monster.  You're not supposed to have favorites, but I do.  And Chloe is mine.  I felt like I was abandoning her.

I used what little time I had left with her to the best of my ability.  I know that it is a human flaw to impose human characteristics upon animals, but I wanted Chloe to know that I love her.  Realistically, I'm sure I just needed to make myself recognize that I loved her.  Either way, I took her for extra long walks, bought her more toys than usual, forced everyone to sit for a family portrait and generally just made a point of being more attentive.

The result of which was that I had somehow managed to cry myself out by the time we made a whirlwind weekend trip down to Orlando and handed Chloe over to Pam and her granddaughter, Bailey, on August 3rd.  We knew our car was going to be stuffed when we made our final departure from Virginia at the end of that month, and we wanted to give them all time to adjust to each other before we headed off to the other side of the world and found ourselves unable to make adjustments if needed, so handing her off early seemed like a smart idea.  Pam did a great job of reassuring us that Chloe was in good hands.  They have a huge yard, a doggy door (always wanted one of those!) and toys galore.  I knew our baby would be in good hands.   As we got in the car to leave, Chloe watched curiously from the screen door.  She didn't look sad, nor happy.  It was just sort of a "Those are my daddies.  They are there and I am here," curious kind of look.  Weeks of emotion had left me dry.  I calmly turned to see TJ, who had been bottling it up for weeks so as not to exacerbate my feelings, finally, briefly, lose it.  The drive back to DC was sad, yet oddly happy.  We knew that Chloe would be well cared for.  And that's the important thing, right?

We had the opportunity to spend some time with her during home leave.  I picked her up from Pam's house on the morning of September 10th and she was so excited to see me that she almost knocked me down running out the front door (Chloe, not Pam).  I had claw marks all over me for days from her trying to crawl into my arms!  We didn't do too much that day.  Just lounged around in a big dog pile watching trashy television (Maury) at the hotel, for the most part.  We did want to spend some alone time with her so, leaving Sophie and Zelda in the room, we loaded Chloe in the car and

headed to Celebration, FL.  TJ lived there when we first started dating and we had been been wanting to stop by to reminisce.  We walked to one of our favorite eateries, The Market Street Cafe, and took a seat outside.  We ordered our favorite dishes and a bowl of water was brought for Chloe.  We had never taken her out to eat like this before, and she behaved like an angel.  We were so proud of her!  After lunch we walked around the lake and the downtown area before heading back to the hotel for some more trash television.

Pam wasn't home when we dropped Chloe off, but Bailey was.  Chloe ran to her just as eagerly as she had run to me that morning.

I know she's in good, loving, capable hands.  I just hope those hands are still willing to release her when two years have passed.